I probably should have done this a long time ago, but this is a friends only LJ. This post marks my graduation from high school! Class of '07, baby! So yeah, this LJ is quite alive compared to its seemingly dead status from the public entries. :) Comment and be added, or just add me and I'll add you.

No fancy banner. Maybe I'll get around to that too.

Memeee. Again. Taking a break from research paper-ing. Stupid existentialist circles. Headache. Anyways, I haven't watched many movies, but yeah.

Taken from ctrl_a:
Go to IMDB.com and look up 10 of your favorite Movies.
Post three official IMDB "Plot Keywords" for these 10 picks.
Have your friends guess the show names.

1. Nightclub, terminal illness, rich snob - Moulin Rouge
2. Father daughter relationship, high society, London - What A Girl Wants
3. Father Son Relationship, Chinatown, Rubik's cube - The Pursuit of Happyness
4. Jar, curse, tentacle - Pirates of the Caribbean (the second one)
5. Writer's block, novel, wristwatch - Stranger Than Fiction
6. Chandelier, gondola, underworld - Phantom of the Opera
7. Chicken, Chinese mafia, counterfeiting operation - Rush Hour 2
8. Memory loss, aquarium, waffles - 50 First Dates
9. Butler, gadget, Tibet - Batman Begins
10. Crooked lawyer, murder trial, faithful husband - Chicago

Some of them easier than others, but good luck!

EDIT with answers. 'Cause like, I don't have that many people who read my LJ anyway. Dx

Merry Christmas and all that!

So I'm on vacation and I think there was something I wanted to post but I can't remember...

Mm, I still need to do some present shopping when I get back.

Have an awesome Christmas!

COMBAT CARDS 2.1

watch superpan fight

CREATE YOUR CARD

o_o;
Now back to homework.

Sweet dreams are made of this
Who am I to disagree?
Travel the world and the seven seas
Everybody's looking for something

I started trying to write the essay again, since I need to submit it by Monday. Luckily, they're accepting it by e-mail now. Anyhow, this time I'm taking the suggestion from my sis. And y'know, 600 words is actually a lot when you're writing it. Well, whatever. Mm... so yesterday, I overslept and woke up with a hugeass headache so I asked my mom to call me in sick and took the day off. It was nice. I went back to sleep and woke up at 11:45am-ish. It was refreshing getting the sleep, but I lost it all last night. Oh well. I wonder what they're looking for in our essays though. There's not really much to say about "growing up as an Asian American" when the rest of the community isn't really... un-Asian. I dunno. I just kind of wonder what they want to read. The form says: "The purpose is to promote cultural connection between generations." I don't really get it.

Like, I kind of understand there is a cultural gap sometimes, but I've pretty much grown up with my Chinese background and stuffs. Mm. It kind of reminds me of when we read The Joy Luck Club though. The mothers and daughters were separated by their generations. Mm, I really liked that book. Well, there'll always be some gap of some sort. It makes me kind of wonder about other Asian families. What are the parents' relationships with their children? I mean, all you hear from Asian teens is complaints about their parents not being satisfied with grades, etc. There's gotta be something deeper than that... y'know? I don't really see my parents much now since I work, but back when I was a kid, I didn't really see them much either. My parents are always working. However, while there does exist somewhat of a gap, I do talk with my parents and I enjoy it when I do.

There is something that bothers me though. Today, when my dad was asking me about what plans I had for Sunday, I replied that I had to go over to a friend's to work on a Lit project. He was saying how while my sister is independent and an adult, I am not and I need to be kept track of. This kind of pisses me off. Once again, he just kind of pops into my life and is able to decide whether or not I get the say. Of course, that's the parent's role, but... I don't know, it just really, really bugs me. "You have your license now and a lot of freedom because of it, but remember that you're not an adult yet." -sigh- Eighteen = adulthood. But, I've been taking care of myself all these years. What does he think I've been doing?

The first star I see, may not be a star.
We can't do a thing but wait.
So lets wait for one more.
And the time, such clumsy time in deciding if it's time.
I'm careful, but not sure how it goes.
You can lose yourself in your courage.

Slowly working on my Hamlet essay. Brings up a lot of questions. I don't know; I complain about AP Lit a lot, but I really think Clark is right. You can't really find the depth of things without suffering. Mm, maybe that's why I try so hard on Lit stuff. I care and I want to find something more from it than just a grade. I know she grades really reasonably though. If you have the evidence to support something, she'll give it to you. As long as your interpretation is backed, you're good. It sucks when you have one or the either but not both, though.

It makes me really wonder about life. Not that I don't already.

(  'Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio--'  )

Have heart, my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if its just for a few days
Making up for all this mess

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you can not hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear 

<3 Snow Patrol. I wanted to go see them perform.

Life is going zooooom. Doing CSU apps, need to actually go ask McSherry sometime "tomorrow." <- PERIOD INSIDE THE QUOTATION MARK. (For those AP Lit people that read my LJ. But not many know that my LJ exists? Or check their LJs.) Life is like a cycle, nowadays. School, home, homework, work, home, dinner, homework, shower, sleep. Then wake up and repeat. Insert RO and some bumming time somewhere in there...

The best thing about life is that person waiting to welcome you home.
Yappari I wanna be with you...

Off to work I go.

Arrr. D:
Yarrr.
Rawr.

HE BE PIRATE.

I'unno, sis said it was "Talk Like a Pirate" Day. So. :x

-waves-

Sooo. Second week of work at the daycare center. It's not so bad, there's up and downs. Work = $. Hurrah? My dad keeps asking how/when I get paid. I'm not really going to walk up to my boss and ask. I'm still a nub at work. I feel bad for continually going to my boss to figure out where I have to be. I showed the other head teacher my schedule and never got it back... I guess I'll confirm with my boss tomorrow on some stuff. :x Deheh. Little kids suck. Especially since their parents don't know how bad they are. It kinda pisses me off that they don't. Asian parents kinda piss me off. Oh, and joy for being stuck with the problem child. He just sits there kinda sleepy-looking and then he kept chucking his worksheets on the ground. The pencil too.

It depresses me because I had a flashback today of me in a daycare at Vallco mall. They had the glass windows looking out into the mall, and I remember always pressing my face against the window, looking for my parents... it made me incredibly sad. :\ I have just a bit of childhood trauma. Another thing that still bothers me today is that trip to the teddy bear factory in like, first grade. My parents didn't write me a check (I can't remember why that is, but I'm almost 100% sure it wasn't me that forgot to ask them) and I never got to make a bear. So, when people talk about their teddy bears... it just, hits me. I can't take it still.

Mm, worries about college stuffs. It's really depressing that a 5th grader at work asked me what college I was going to and what I was going to major in. 'Cause I don't know. I don't know where I'm going from here. I was looking at CSU stuffs, but I keep getting the CSU bashingness. And Jenny says she'll kill me if I go to a CSU (aside from the Cal Polys). I'm applying to UCs and CSUs. I don't want to apply to any privates, not just because of the hassle, but also because I'm just not interested. I really wouldn't mind going to De Anza then transferring either. Meh. I don't know. The CSU business stuffs looks alright. Whatever... to be honest, I'm so outright utterly sick of school at the moment. Just... everything. I don't mean to be emo, but I hate it. I hate it so much.


(Mm, I have this song stuck in my head. I blame you just a bit, Phil. :x But it's not like I wasn't listening to it a lot anyway.)

I keep dreaming you’ll be with me
And you’ll never go
Stop breathing if
I don’t see you anymore 

Foolish? :\ Maybe...
But it's why I keep moving along.

What's this... LJ thing? Anyways, I'm not changing my thing to a pro account just to fiddle with the new layout thingies... even though they look so pretty... Man, I haven't even THOUGHT about LJ and Xanga for so long. It's pretty amazing. :\

Sooo, Pops Concert was awesome as usual (excluding us singing, but anyway). Defying Gravity and For Good <3. I reallyyy want to see Wicked now. :( The band senior thingies were amusing as usual. Haha, Doc as Darth Vader. And I need to watch The Producers. Yeah.

I can't stand being at home now. Every other word from my dad's mouth is either about how to exercise or what to eat. Nyeh. I got pissed off and just didn't eat dinner today. Plus it was Club Day so I wasn't too hungry either. But yeah. I'd rather not be home when I can be, despite wanting to play RO and whatnot. Mehhh. Only about a year more.

AP LIT SUMMER READING LIST:
- Handmaid's Tale
- Catch 22
- Frankenstein

Woot.

I hate how I'm such a hypocrite. But yeah. I use homework as an excuse all the time to keep myself in my room all the time. But he doesn't really even care what I'm doing. As long as I'm not eating too much and I lose weight. That's all. I guess it's not completely true to say he doesn't care. I really do love my dad. Well, to a certain extent. How well I do in school and how important that is all relies on how I feel about it. It's good they're not typical Asian parents. Yet, at times, I wish they were. I have no motivation to do anything in my life. Study for SATs and whatnot. It allows me a lot of freedom compared to a lot of people, though. I'm just kind of sad.

I can't help but often think:
"He doesn't understand."

My parents both work all day to enable me to live the way I do. I'm grateful for that. Meh. I just don't know.

College and everything.
It's up to me.
What I want to do and what I'm willing to do.

Bleh.
And that's my pseudo emo-ness for you.

<td align="center"> Stephanie --
[adjective]:

Smells like teen spirit

'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com</td>

Woot. I need to listen to that song, too.


<td align="center"> Steph --
[noun]:

A real life muppet

'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com</td>

Muppet!

There is a hell of a lot of old shiz down at the bottom of my LJ front page. o_O Stuff from like... a long time ago. About a certain guy I used to like. (He is still a hopeless bum, by the way.) It got me thinking. Maybe last week or so, I spoke the first two words in like two years to that guy from Freshman year. The two words were "excuse me" too. Eheh. Well, I have no classes with him, hardly see him, and I definitely have nothing to say to him. -shrug- Oh well. Coming home today. :] Did not do much APUSH. Oh well.

I'm probably not going to come to Caltech. I might apply for the heck of it. I'unno. I always say I want to go to UCLA, but I haven't seriously considered many colleges yet. Oh, and I want to visit CMU sometime. Mpht. SAT scores next Monday. Screwdom.

Hiiii. I'm alive. Kinda. I've forgotten how pretty LJs look. After a while, I just kind of wonder who reads stuff that's posted in online journals. Or at least, MY online journals. So I've just been posting short stuff on Xanga and my actual weblog has died. I don't know if I want to try reviving it again. Nyeh. I'll think about it later.

So, a lot of crap has happened since I last posted. I've been learning to deal. And how not to deal. It makes me sad because I haven't matured a bit in that sense. I really am a child at heart. Not to mention in how I act. It's a crime to life to live only having fun. Yet I do it anyway and I guess that's what I get for doing so. I'll grow up... eventually. I'm sort of in a state at the moment where I need to restructure my life. I dumped off something that I should've a long time ago. It's harsh to say in that way, but I don't know how else I would say it. And although I have felt better since, there are a lot of things I regret having done. Either way, I'll move onward. This time I can really live without being held back by a past I can't change. Hum, and nowI have work I need to do that I probably could do if I set my mind and energy to it. But I just don't.. "feel like it"? It's not exactly the way I want to phrase it. Ramble, ramble.

High school dramaaaa.

(1) Her ex is a bastard. I'm somewhat biased since I don't know much about him, but yeah. She's still not quite over him. I can tell. She's hopeful that they can still talk and stuff despite having broken up. But I can seriously say that there will never be a chance of having a reasonably nice conversation with him anytime soon. Unless he actually does what he says he will. That lying stoned drunkard. (No offense to a certain few people who do drugs but are still decent people.)

(2) Something between girls. #1 says crap about #2 but isn't really good friends with #2 and then #2 hears from #3 the crap that #1 has been saying and now #2 doesn't want to have anything to do with #1. Or something like that. Mpht.

So #1: I don't really know that much about her; I only got to know her well this year because we have class together. From what I know,  I wouldn't think she'd do that. But I hear otherwise from a good friend of hers. She's a good person, but somewhat sketchy sometimes.

#2: She's okay. I don't know her overly well either. She complains a lot sometimes (but who doesn't, so). She works hard. She's pretty smart. She's kinda vain and definitely shallowy (again, who isn't?).

#3: Tries to be happy all the time, not as immature as she seems, has to deal with a lot, pretty strong, works super hard. Friend of both #1 and #2. Doesn't know who to side with. Doesn't want conflict.

It's not a conflict that everyone knows about though. It involves a club though. And running for positions. Bleh. About that, I'm going for secretary and I have pretty big ambitions for the position. We'll see what happens.

I think I've done enough rambling for now. I'm gonna head to the otearai and then attempt to do some APUSH. Somewhat successfully too, hopefully. Peace.

Edit: This is the list I made up to figure out the years when I added the schools on my user info. -is a dork-

1994 - 1995   Blue Hills Kindergartener
1995 - 1996   Blue Hills 1st Grader
1996 - 1997   Blue Hills 2nd Grader
1997 - 1998   Blue Hills 3rd Grader
1998 - 1999   Blue Hills 4th Grader
1999 - 2000   Blue Hills 5th Grader
2000 - 2001   Blue Hills 6th Grader
---
2001 - 2002   Miller 7th Grader
2002 - 2003   Miller 8th Grader
---
2003 - 2004   Lynbrook Freshman
2004 - 2005   Lynbrook Sophomore
2005 - 2006   Lynbrook Junior
[2006 - 2007   Lynbrook Senior]

LJ revival? Maybe. Just a ramble about school and the crapload of stuff I have to do that I'm not doing right now. I know it'd only make me more stressed with it not done, but it's like I don't really care anymore. I do finish it though.

So, yeah, this year has been busy so far and will continue to be. I didn't even realize until Jenn mentioned like maybe a few days ago that we've covered like 15 chapters in two months in APUSH. It's been interesting and I don't really regret taking the class. Then there was talking in precalc today. "We don't start chapters in APUSH, we just finish them." True, true.

And then there's AP Chem. Where I sit makes it very amusing. I like chem, but I'm not good at it, I guess. Or overly good at it, anyway. I managed to raise my grade from a C- to a B (72% to 85%). I never noticed how big of a gap there was between an A and a B until this year. Not to mention the gap between a C and a B. So with my classes right now, I'm content with a B in APUSH and a B in AP Chem. Even my dad said a B was okay. Amazing, isn't it? Not completely stereotypical Asian.

That's another thing: I really like my family these days. Despite all the schoolwork and stuff, I can still connect. I might be kind of cranky sometimes and etc. though. I feel bad for making my parents (mostly my dad I guess) have to deal with it. It's not their fault and they haven't yelled at me or anything.

Mm, back to chem stuff.